Removing the Cross from Christendom

In the days before the time of Jesus, when Israel was under roman rule and occupation, killing people was a common practice. One could be executed or “put to death” for any number of countless reasons. (One might observe the similarities to some modern day Middle Eastern countries in today’s world, sadly.) There were used a variety of different methods to torture punish and execute those who broke the law or even just stirred up trouble. One could be stoned to death (yes this practice is still in use today in some parts of the world as shocking as that may seem to those of us in more compassionate and evolved countries…) — as barbaric as that sounds they indeed would literally throw large heavy stones at a person for hours until that person eventually died from the abuse or at least passed out. Beheading was anther popular method. Hanging was another. One of the most common methods used during the time of Roman occupied Israel was what they called crucifixion, whereby a man would have his hands and feet nailed to two planks of wood fashioned together in the form of a cross and be set upright to slowly die from thirst hunger exhaustion bleeding out and/or the grueling effects of gravity’s exertion on the body’s organs, especially the lungs — they would literally die an excruciatingly painful death from being suffocated to death or worse having their organs cave in on themselves. For more details on the practice of crucifixion, google it. It’s quite a feat of human ingenuity and imagination and takes a truly sick mind to come up with.

Crucifixion was so common during the time of Jesus’s day that on any given day up to fifty to (some historians claim) one hundred men would be crucified. Crucifixion simply put was not a special form of execution. It was common practice.

Over the last two-thousand plus years since the death of this man we know as Jesus of Nazareth a slow moving (at first) but heavy handed cult of propaganda has been thrust upon humankind, much of it involuntarily mandatory and by force, which has turned much of the modern population of planet earth into self-professed “Christians” I.e. followers of Jesus. Granted some come to it by choice, while most are simply born into the belief system and never give it a second thought.

One of the many ideas and belief systems that automatically tag along with Christianity is this symbol of the cross, or “crucifix” as it is called by some; in fact many people both christian and non-christian alike would claim that the cross just might be the single most important and enduring symbol representative of the christian faith. Anyone who sees a cross automatically associates it with Christianity. But is this even a desirable reality? That’s the question Christians and the larger governing body should be asking themselves.

We all know why this is. Jesus the man died by execution for blasphemy and heresy at the hands of his own people by being nailed to a cross and crucified. So the cross quickly turned into a symbol of Jesus and his ministry. It was a simple and easy to recognize symbol.

But as explained above this was no singularly important event, this crucifixion of Jesus. Thousands before him died this way. Tens of thousands after him. Hell, Jesus wasn’t even the only man who was crucified that DAY, the one that is now known (ironically) as “Good Friday”. As everyone knows there were three men in total who were beaten tortured and executed by crucifixion that very day, Jesus being just one of them.

There was nothing special about the way Jesus died. On the contrary, it was a rather ordinary and commonplace event. When one studies the life of Jesus one is not impressed by or taken with how he died, but rather with how he lived. There are countless more intriguing stories regarding Jesus than his being one of three “criminals” put to death that day. This is why the event itself is barely allotted even one full sentence in any of the history books we have of that time [See the works of Pliny the Elder or Josephus], and most likely why the event is so casually dismissed and NOT paid attention to by Jews. Jesus was after all a fellow Jew. But to them, from their historic perspective, Jesus from Nazareth was just one of thousands of criminals who was executed during the reign of King Herod. So there isn’t much to pay attention to.

The real meat in the life of Jesus, in the stories and legends that have cropped up over the centuries about this legendary man is to be found in the countless miracles he purportedly performed — healing the sick, giving sight to the blind, walking on water, ESP, telepathy and even bringing the dead back to life. The man was a veritable David Copperfield of his day.

His life, though we know so little of it, is filled with magical stories of truly mythic proportions. And this is where and when one begins to become impressed by him. Get to know him well enough and one can easily be led to swoon, for not only was he a quick wit and a charismatic character, but there is much “magic” surrounding those few years we know of his short ministry. He was both infinitely loving tolerant and compassionate towards others AND vehemently disciplined and dictatorial in his rigorous commitment to what he believed to be his mission and calling by none other than God Him/Her/Itself.

This is no small claim, to assert that one believes they are not only in touch with but being guided by the highest most evolved and primal force in the entire universe who created everything. On several occasions Jesus even claims he was the the “son” of this infinitely powerful, all knowing force. Quite a claim indeed.

Perhaps greatest of all the wondrous miracle stories about Jesus though is this idea that less than 48 hours after he died and was confirmed dead he miraculously came back to life, albeit in a more ethereal and less earthly form. THIS is the event that is celebrated around the world on the day known as Easter Sunday. Jesus’s alleged Reserection from the dead. Depending on whose account you read or believe he “rose from the dead” and appeared before many of his disciples over a period of days — some say 40 and others say up to 300; he even still purportedly had the holes in his hands from where they hammered the nails through them some stories claim. Others say he appeared more like a ghostly apparition. But most accounts claim he stayed here on earth after he arose from the dead to preach a bit more and hand out certain orders from God and then he disappeared — as it was retold by witnesses and then embellished over centuries by the Roman Empire, a group not exactly immune to gross exaggeration and fairytale-like hyperbole, he reportedly ascended (as in magically floated up in the air) into “heaven” to sit at the right hand of his father (that would be God… Just where God keeps these chairs and what keeps them afloat is still a mystery…) — never to be seen or heard from again.

Before doing this he promised to return one day and save us all (believers that is…) from a hell on earth that would be flat out apocalyptic. (Are we there yet? It sure feels as though we are. But then again it probably felt that way during the Great Plague or the Dark Ages or The Inquisition or during any number of World Wars we’ve had the pleasure of enduring due to a few overly ambitious selfish and greedy assholes). Hence the whole “Jesus is going to come back (“the second coming” as its called — perhaps because fundamentalist Christians don’t stress the importance of secular education very much — subjects like math and science — it would actually be his third coming if we are going to be literal) –once the great temple in Israel is rebuilt… Bumper stickers referring to “The Rapture” or “End Times” are also related to this idea.

If all that isn’t enough to render the actual crucifixion a rather mundane event, Jesus is also credited for completely reforming humanity’s conception of God and Divinity. A simple examination comparing the God of the Torah and Old Testament with the NEW God Jesus speaks of in the New Testament shows a completely evolved, nearly transcendent idea of divinity itself — more akin to the Godhead of Eastern religions of the day or even the Buddha — compassionate, infinitely loving and tolerant, intelligent, no more playing favorites or being wrathful or vengeful, as compared with the overtly human God of the Old Testament, savage and barbaric and filled with human attributes and weaknesses. Jesus was killed precisely for these reasons. He was if anything a revolutionary and a visionary — in addition to his more mysteriously magical abilities.

It is for these reasons that the cross should not only NOT be the most important and significant symbol of the christian faith as it is today, but it should not even be a symbol of Christendom at all. The cross that Jesus was hung on, just like all the other alleged criminals of his day, is a small detail of the bigger picture, just as an image of a hangman’s noose would be had Jesus been hung rather than crucified. Not only is the focus inherently turned toward something mundane for the time and the larger scope of things, but it is also a rather violent, gory and negative aspect of the Jesus story when considering how overtly positive the story really is. In reality isn’t the whole idea of the christian Faith tradition a celebration of the miracles, the message and the Reserection of Jesus? And not his unfortunate death or how he died? Those are mere sidebars when compared to what impresses the most about the man, his message or his myriad works of miracles.

The cross may be simple and easy to recognize, but that doesn’t and shouldn’t automatically qualify it to be the grand and perfect symbol that it’s become of Christianity.

Some modern day pastors, especially the more “Fundamentalist” oriented, and even some theologians may argue that the most important aspect of Jesus’s life was and still is the crucifixion because of this concept put forth by Calvin and Luther called Substitution — the idea that “humanity is inherently so sinful so as to not be good or righteous enough to have a direct relationship with God, and thus needed Jesus to act as a substitute for us, to die on the cross as a sacrifice to atone for the “sins of man”, and as much as I get this idea and appreciate the beauty of it — Jesus became in essence “a new sacrificial lamb” rendering the regular sacrificing of animals to God unnecessary, thereby creating a new covenant between God and humankind — I do not believe that it is inherently necessary as a Christian (or any other religion for that matter) to believe the idea that humankind is born eternally sinful so as to not be able to experience a direct relationship with God or The Divine on their own.

Of course I make this claim AFTER the fact. I am well aware of this potential irony. Jesus has already performed this action some two-thousand years ago and therefore I am speaking from my own personal experiences of my relationship with The Divine now, after he did this; therefore I cannot possibly relate to what humankind’s relationship with God was like before Jesus’s death. But I would submit that God, if there is one — and because I have had so many personal tangible experiences with this Divine Force we call God, I can easily and confidently claim to know there is — is much bigger than most people give Him/Her/It credit.

While it is true that some people stay focused on and nearly obsessed with their own inherent sinfulness and therefore the Substitution, sacrifice and Atonement aspect of Jesus, this is strictly their trip and as much as they’re entitled to it, it certainly doesn’t have to apply to all of us. Jesus himself when speaking of God drew from such a deeper more evolved enlightened and intelligent viewpoint that he essentially retired this old fashioned idea of a God who is “too good for us lowly humans” from mass consciousness.

This is not to say that there is no credence or relevance to the sacrifice that Jesus the man made when choosing to be executed when he obviously could have so easily escaped or fought back successfully — he was after all the most God-like being in human form that history has ever known, quite possibly he may have literally been “THE God” in human form as he occasionally hinted he might have been. So his execution via crucifixion was clearly his deliberate plan and doing, and not the doing of others — regardless of how much those who did the deed believe they were actually responsible for it. (They’re kidding themselves). He was well versed in the prophecies of the Torah and the Prophets and he planned and executed a very direct path of actions and events that literally fulfilled those prophecies of the coming Messiah of the Jewish people to a tee. [If this is a subject that interests you there are several books — or probably now even websites — that delve into the life of Jesus directly as each event in his life specifically correlates to a prophecy that was predicted and written about hundreds of years before bis birth. Right down to his execution and even HOW he was executed AND his subsequent Reserection.]

So clearly Jesus, after much time attempting to change the hearts and minds of his fellow Judeans through his message and the example of his actions turned out unsuccessful, decided at some point that he would venture down this alternative path of mass atonement of humankind’s sins through his own sacrifice — even though he was flat out telling people for years the good news that God did indeed forgive them automatically because He loved them so much, all they had to do was ask for it and it would be granted; but they just didn’t get it… And then of course to really hammer the idea home he went further and resurrected from the dead.

After all (one is sure he probably thought at the time) who would not be shifted changed mesmerized convinced or transformed through witnessing a man transcend death itself? If it happened in modern times it would be hard to imagine anyone not being completely transformed by witnessing or even hearing about such an event. And yet as we know from history itself the political powers that be in the Jewish religion in Jesus’s time were either too frightened of the repercussions of admitting to owning such a miraculous event OR too pissed off at Jesus for his version of Messiahness being so different than theirs: they were looking for a very primitively temporal and human freedom from bondage and enslavement and instead he offered a much larger version of this idea of freedom.

The truth is we will never know exactly why they decided to kill a man as innocent and harmless as Jesus and save a man as sinister and wicked as Barabas, because we weren’t there. And there exists no known notes from those times, at least none that the Jewish religion has ever released publicly, that explain the reasons for their actions or even their feelings about the incident. Mum has always been the word from the Jewish people regarding Jesus. As stated above already, as far as they are concerned he was “just another criminal who deserved to be executed.”

But even if every single thing that happened to Jesus throughout his short life on earth was preordained by a higher power and even he himself was aware of what was to come and planned it all out — including the crucifixion and Reserection, one still finds that the method of execution was by and large nothing more than a mere sidebar compared to the bigger picture of his message and actions and therefore the cross is simply too simple and too irrelevant a symbol to represent the immense proportions and importance of what Christianity means today. Im not saying it will be easy to create another symbol that better represents the life and message of Jesus. I’m simply saying that it’s well past time for all of us to transcend the symbolism of this simple image and create something else that is a better more relevant fit.

– Posted by The Ambassador using BlogPress on an iPhone

Little House On the Prairie Versus Contemporary Society

So there it is. Another Sunday waving goodbye. I’ve come to enjoy this ritual of ending the day w/ an episode or 2 of Little House On the Prairie. Purchased the entire Season 1, as I’ve never seen it. What comes to mind most often while watching it, along with hundreds of other thoughts, is just how much society, hence collective consciousness, has changed over the last 40 years.

The show depicts sincere straight forward simple stories about living and being alive. No irony satire sarcasm or cynicism, all so rampant in today’s model of entertainment — i.e. no fear of being judged or criticized for being real or kind or honest or good — the fundamental thoughts and feelings beneath aforementioned irony cynicism satire and sarcasm, fear. Instead the benefits of virtues are emphasized; ideas long lost at some point along the way in modern times such as kindness, hard work, honesty, fidelity, connection w/ the divine, family values and the like are not only explored but downright encouraged. Straight faced, without a nod or a wink or a tongue in cheek. One couldn’t find anything even remotely similar to it today.

Of course Little House portrayed life in the 19th century, understood, when life was simpler and civilization had not yet reached a state of excess — thus greed and self-centered pleasure-experience seeking had not yet boroughed it’s way into mass consciousness as a main priority. Those things would come later, when surviving became all but guaranteed — this is after all the natural flow of the evolution of all sentient being civilizations. And yet lest we forget, Little House aired during the 1970s, long after the industrial revolution, when survival was indeed by all accounts all but guaranteed. Yet it somehow managed to still find an audience that could not only relate to it, but sincerely welcome it.

The question begged now is what changed in the last 40 years?
No blood gore violence crime murder CSI vampires zombies gratuitous sex adultery lying and deceit taken for granted billionaire playboys shallow busty airheads like Snooki or KK, no drug kingpins villains disguised as heroes vulgarity or nudity. Just simple stories extolling the virtues of being a good person and doing your best for yourself, your family and your neighbor. As far away from what passes for entertainment in today’s world as can be imagined. One would be hard pressed to believe that anything remotely similar could find an audience in modern times.

But why? Again…what has changed? What went missing? Or what got added in consciousness to create such a stark drastic change in such a short period of time?

It’s worth pondering…

– Posted by The Ambassador using BlogPress on an iPhone

The Biology of the Changing Seasons

The sun is out white hot and bright today; the sky near perfectly flawlessly clear and brilliant blue. It’s a sharp contrast to the freezing temperatures, gray overcast skies and constant onslaught of snow we’ve been experiencing for almost a week in the Northeast. But one would do well not to be fooled by this recent change in the weather, for though the skies are clear and blue and the sun is shining bright, the temperature today is a biting 21° and according to weather forecasters will not rise above 25. It’s the kind of cold that hurts your skin if you’re exposed to it for any longer than a few minutes. At first it’s pin pricks. Then a numbing swelling-like pain. And if there is ever a pickup in the wind, forget about it — t’s a physically brutal and near unbearable condition to spend any considerable amount of time in.

But unlike most, who seem to get as much of a kick out of complaining about cold weather as they do sunbathing on a sunny day in June, I have loved every minute of this Winter’s snow and freezing temperatures. For me there is something very appealing about this cold weather, considering that it’s perfectly normal for winter — I don’t see how we have a right to complain about it, let alone dislike it — as if we were somehow entitled to warmer temperatures just because we are used to getting everything we want. I find the cold and snow quite enjoyable, desirable even; comforting in a paradoxically warm and cozy way.

Clearly this attitude does not apply to everyone; some people blatantly profess out loud to dislike the cold and snowy weather of winter. (It makes one wonder why then do they choose to live in a seasonally volatile locale like New York City if they’re going to complain about it every year…) Plenty of people for generations have moved from the Midwest and the Northeast down south to warmer climates specifically for this reason. My family in fact were diehard self professed “yankees” from New York and Pennsylvania and yet because, as all people do once retired, my grandparents moved to South Florida, I was obligated to grow up there.

From the day I was born I can always remember disliking Florida; feeling like a fish out of water, an outlier. There was nothing about it except the beach that I liked or felt connected to in the least. Some people feel right at home where they grow up. It is after all for all intents and purposes “home”. But I never felt at home growing up. Rather I felt like an alien who was forced to make a pit stop in a strange and foreign and hostile land. Like an outsider. As if I were the only one, all alone in seeing how terribly wrong and ass backwards it was there. From the climate to the people it just didn’t feel right down there. I didn’t fit and everyone knew it. There are few things as upsetting to the psyche of a young mind than never feeling like you fit in somewhere when everyone around you is acting as if everything is perfectly fine.

In elementary school during what we were told was “winter” we were instructed to draw snowflakes or snowmen, as all kids are in the States. But we’d never even seen snow let alone built a snowman. During the Fall we were always asked to draw all these different colored leaves of orange and yellow and red to decorate the room — yet we’d never experienced the changing colors of Autumn. Our teachers attempted to explain to us what autumn was…or why they called it “Fall”. But the explanations fell on deaf ears. All around us were green trees 365 days out of the year. There is no Autumn in Florida. Just as there is no winter and no spring. So these were ideas that only became real to us through the movies or TV. Talk about feeling like you’re missing out…. Gloves mittens scarves winter coats galoshes hats long-johns snowmen snowball fights skiing hot cocoa warm cozy fireplaces…these were all things that seemed entirely foreign to us as children growing up in a temperate climate that never had seasons. It felt as if a very large part of growing up, of being a human on planet earth, was being withheld from us, a large piece of the collective pie of civilization was totally off limits to our experience. These were things we couldn’t even relate to, let alone know anything about. It set up a real “us and them” paradigm in our young minds to be sure. We never had White Christmases. In fact we didn’t even understand most Of the lyrics of those classic Christmas songs. Sleigh bells in the snow? What? The idea that people would deliberately ever desire to move down to Florida or the South for that matter seemed a ridiculous notion. Why on earth would anyone want to do that and give up all that fun stuff associated with the seasons that we saw on TV and in the movies?

The first time I ever felt “at home” in the world was my first visit to New York. It was a palpable change in feeling, change of state inside of me. A brand new sense of calm, ease and letting go. A great big physical and psychological sigh of relief. The first time I ever felt relaxed and not on guard in my entire life. As soon as I got into my first taxi I just immediately felt different, transformed, happy, grounded — as if some invisible force was whispering into my ear “you are home…” I experienced the same thing in Vermont, Chicago, Wisconsin (and of course later in Italy, but that’s another story…). Anywhere that had seasons really. I began to understand that home had very little to do with where we are born or raised or where our family resides, but instead it goes much deeper than that. It’s more of a feel thing, up to each individual and how the environment affects their mind and body.

I don’t pretend to believe that this sudden transformation was due entirely to the weather. I am sure that culture and people also contribute to it as well. But for now, here, I am specifically focusing on the weather, especially as it relates to the changing of the seasons.

For me, someone who was raised primarily in the south, I find the cold weather of winter extremely comforting and grounding. It’s as if the cold winter weather is somehow attached to our very souls from some primordial source the dates back hundreds of thousands of years. A biological connection to the changing seasons perhaps through thousands of lifetimes of different incarnations on earth; or perhaps an even deeper more primitive genetic predisposition to the seasons based on the fact that nearly every atom in our body is comprised of the same stuff as planet earth is. We share the same molecular heritage and thus anything the earth is accustomed to so too are we.

I have concluded over many years living in the north now as compared to living in the south that there has to be some sort of biological reason for this almost supernatural attachment human beings have to the changing of the seasons. It is as if by our very nature, being biological organisms, that we are as attached and attracted to the cold of winter and the blossoming of spring and the luxurious warmth and heat of the summer as the earth is.

Now of course this might not be the case at all; it might be more of a purely subjective preferential cause-and-effect matter. Some people like cold-weather, and some people don’t. But I cannot speak for others. I can only speak for myself. And for me I have always found the cold weather and snow of winter as appealing as I do the warm weather and hot son of a day at the beach during summertime. Truth be told I cannot readily relate to those who desire to live in climates that do not regularly change seasons. Such was the case in Florida where if it dips below 70 people go crazy and throw on three or four layers of winter clothing because they’re so unaccustomed to cold weather. Not only are they not accustomed to it, they are overtly against it and claim to dislike it. This attitude against what can only be considered one of the most natural aspects of earthly living possible has always struck me as being very odd. But again it is after all a seemingly subjective thing.

Why is it that some of us prefer our winters to be cold and our Summers to be hot? Why do some of us prefer the changing of the seasons so much more than others? Some people don’t seem to have a preference at all whether the season changes in their environment, not even a little bit. This mentality I do not understand. I believe there is a divine purpose to the elegant and subtle changing of earth’s seasons. Something that not only greatly benefits the earth and all of its various species and inhabitants but also a profound yet subtle benefit to the heart and soul of humankind.

Seasons are landmarks, rights of passage, outposts in the desert of existence that help map our journey through life, each as important as the other. Just as one ends, always perfectly at the right time, and another begins, so too does our state of mind. There is something very unnatural about living in an environment that never changes seasons. The human heart and body are deprived of something powerful, perhaps even essential, which is why you’ll never hear me complain about the cold and snow, nor the heat and sun. They all have their rightful place. Just as we do. Many people are aware of Florida’s reputation for extreme corruption. Law enforcement calls it the “fraud capital of the United States”. Perhaps the unnatural never changing constantly hot weather plays a role in this strange anomaly that gives Florida it’s duplicitous reputation… I don’t know. But I do know that it doesn’t FEEL right. One only need spend one year in a locale that has four distinct seasons and they will feel forever changed for the better, recharged and refreshed equally from each though in a different way.

Right now we are enjoying Winter, in all of its glory, from temperatures below 0 to piles and piles of snow decorating the city in a luxurious soft white, to the slower pace brought about by the limitations of such frigid temperatures. And yet at the same time there also seems to be a cheery spark in everyone’s eyes as well. I couldn’t imagine spending January February or March in 80 degree weather as they do in California or Florida. It just wouldn’t be natural. In time Spring will arrive. The big coats and floppy hats will come off. Sun dresses and flip flops will start popping up everywhere and eventually be as ubiquitous as the bursting colors of fresh cherry blossoms and other floral delights. How else would we know this spring if not for this Winter? We wouldn’t. And that’s the point of it all.

– Posted by The Ambassador using BlogPress on an iPhone 8s Custom

– Posted by The Ambassador using BlogPress on an iPhone

Quick Notes on the Real Origins of Humankind and the God Concept

Haven’t pieced these thoughts together yet. Just note taking. But thought it better to copy and paste here rather than not. (I am literally sitting on hundreds and hundreds of pages in various places on my phone or hard drives that have not yet made it to the Transcendence Diaries. So in order to prevent that from continuing to happen, this — though perhaps tending to lead to some confusion in reading comprehension — shall be the fix, quick copy and pastes when a lack of time necessitates. I can always come back later and edit or amend).

Yes still studying… No not that, that, that or that. BUT this: So it turns out that the Abrahamic Torah/Bible/Qur’an stories of Genesis, Creation, the Flood, Moses, the Tower of Babel and hundreds of others are copied literally word for word from ancient Sumerian texts written thousands of years before. Maybe this was already common knowledge (?), but i honestly had no idea… Mind blown. This is not “Jewish oral history of their ancestors written down by scribes”, nor the “word of God (capital G) transcribed by man”, but rather ancient stories (true or not is arguable) from clay tablets written between 4000 and 2700 BC in Sumer. And there are tens of thousands of these being translated still… It ALL seems to go back to and originally come from the Sumerians. (Modern day Iraq…. Go figure).

And yes, undoubtedly the first humans to do just about everything — writing, advanced math, create the alphabet, astronomy, physics, human history, astrology, ad infinitum — were people of color.
Which makes me wonder…is THIS one of the reasons why, as we are growing up in the West, are we taught the later versions of these inventions by the Romans or the Greeks or the Hebrews? As in “has it been a conspiracy all this time to misinform people just WHO created and discovered everything? To be more exact, to HIDE the fact that it was actually people of color…?
OR… Is it simply due to the fact that this is fairly new data and “we” just didn’t know all this when we were in school? I mean this IS fairly new data… Many of these clay tablets are still being translated today….
I’d venture to say its a little bit of both probably.

For example we know that the entire book of Genesis was taken from two different sources, which were written over 500 years apart (500 BC and 1000 BC approx.) but both told very similar stories… So ancient Jewish scribes and then modern scholars spliced the two together to create one fluid though confusing work. Hence the repeated passages of many of the stories AND the many contradictions.
But they’ve now traced these stories back to their origins — as far back as 2700 BC — nearly 5000 years ago, 2000 years earlier than when we thought they were written. Amazing. All from the Sumerian culture (which then turned into the Babylonian culture etc), and all written down in the three different alphabets and languages that the Sumerians slowly evolved over time — first cuneiform, then eventually the more advanced Phoenician (phonetic) alphabet that so many cultures used as their starting ground for their own language and alphabet.

We have always been told that the Hebrews / Israelites eventually discovered writing and when they did they started writing down their oral history. “The Gods created human beings from clay and earth”, “created woman afterwards from the rib of man” = Sumerian. “Moses abandoned by his mother in a basket sealed with pitch and let loose in a River to be adopted by a Queen…” = ancient Sumerian. “The plagues of blood etc” “The flood that killed off nearly everything on earth” = Sumerian. But now we are learning that they were in fact just writing down these stories that had been around for thousands of years before; furthermore even their alphabet and language is largely based on Sumerian. The numbers. The letters. The months of the year. It’s crazy.

Now here’s where it becomes “Matrixy”. In all of these original stories, the Sumerian ones, they claim that what they are saying is TRUE. We are told that these are all “myths”… Some believe that. Others more orthodox — Jewish, Christian and Muslim– believe them to be actual history. But they are NOT Jewish history. That we can be sure of. (I know. That opens up a whole shelf of cans of worms for a LOT of people who NEED this to be Jewish history, especially Christians and Muslims)….

At some point the Jews DID start focusing in on this idea of “one god instead of many” — most likely gotten from the Persian Mede people and their Zoroastrian religion (first known stories of “one good god versus one evil god). So they’ve now got this monotheistic ideology going… But the stories they’ve adopted all speak of “gods” — as in multiple gods, i.e. “The gods who created mankind”. Even the Jewish biblical Genesis story of creation has more than one god in it. “We” “us” “let us make them in our image” etc. But the Jews liked this idea of ONE god just as persian Zoroastrianism did. So they began changing the stories to reflect that it was ONE god who was doing all these things. But the stories they are all taken from all refer to a “group of gods” “who come from the sky in spaceships” etc. And this is where they claim to have gotten all their knowledge and technology etc.

Besides elaborate written histories and explanations they also drew tens of thousands of pictures to show their history — our history. They show things like the entire solar system w all ten planets (most of which we wouldn’t “discover” until modern optics in at least the 1500s onward). And yes this is why many are still searching for this mysterious tenth planet — Nibiru — because they even knew about Jupiters moons and Saturn’s rings. Things we didn’t know about till 4500 years later.

Furthermore these gods are giant, like twice the height of humans. They have space helmets on and space suits and they are often depicted in space ships. Jet propulsion is even discussed. It’s all quite mind boggling.

The kings of Sumer all lived to be 900 to thousands of years. Sounds familiar right?

Of course at some point “the powers that be” of both Israel (the priestly order of the temple) AND then Rome did away with all this talk of multiple gods who came from the sky and genetically created mankind. They transformed these historic stories of origin into a more esoteric “wrathful vengeful judging god figure who sees everything and only they (the rabbis/priests) can communicate with etc and created all these laws that most people still believe in today.

But in reality that was just a power-grab to control the masses through fear and we most likely have very good logical rational sources now for where we come from, why we were made, who made us, etc. And it has nothing to do with the “God” of Israel or Catholicism or Christianity or Islam. He at least was a very useful tool being passed down through the ages becoming all the more powerful as larger and larger empires used “him” (who was really “them”) to gain control of land money people and resources.

Which of course begs us to now ask “so when we are in church or synagogue and praying, just who the hell are we praying to?!?”

Questions Regarding the Latest Theories on the Origins of Humankind

Four to five weeks ago I got this idea to start listening to specific brainwave stimulating tones while sleeping in order to up my cerebral potential and increase certain aspects of consciousness. My first thought was to purchase a few Hemisync programs from The Monroe Institute, believing them to still be the leading researchers in brainwave manipulation. But after a little research (primarily looking through YouTube for Hemisync programs that might have been uploaded), I discovered that this field has made tremendous progress. The Monroe Institute is no longer the only player on the pitch. There are a variety of different theories and technologies out there now from all over the world in the field of brain and consciousness stimulation and modulation using tones, monaural tone tech, binaural beats, 532 Hz, A432 retuning tones, chakra balancing, third eye and pineal gland stimulation, subliminal affirmations, audible affirmations, meditations, etc etc.

This research still continues on my part, and I’ll report on it at a later date IF i decide that I’ve found ONE technology that I believe works better than another. So far I am enjoying and seeming to benefit from using a variety of them — every night, while sleeping. It seems to be working.

As often happens in these scenarios — especially for those of us who tend to have a broad attention span (sounds better than ADD doesn’t it?), while studying this particular field, I chanced upon other topics of research too, specifically various videos dealing with expanded consciousness. Some of you probably remember. I began posting what I was finding to Twitter and Facebook to share whenever I found anything that was particularly earth shattering. I quickly landed in the world of Sacred Geometry (which really was mind blowing), then ancient knowledge meets cutting edge new science. For weeks this is all I studied. I managed to get through every bit of new data that up until that point I was not familiar with or hadn’t already studied. And it is, I must admit, very interesting stuff. I created playlists on YouTube, so if anyone else wants to catch up with the latest research in these fields, they can just go to these Playlists.

What you’ll notice though is that the playlists tend to have a lot of cross pollination. Some of the videos clearly go into the Ancient Knowledge heading. Some of them start veering into the Conspiracy Theories heading. Some of them go into Alternative Spirituality. And still another group tends to lean more in the direction of Alternative Anthropology, Archeology or Cosmology.

The problem is due to the fact that just about everything that we think we know about ALL of these subjects is WRONG. The whole world is walking around with all of this alleged scientific or religious or historical data in their heads that we’ve learned since we were kids, but it’s all old, outdated and some of it just flat out made up bs. So once you start down this path of “catching up” in one arena, say the history of human civilization, you soon enter into the Conspiracy field — because so much of this information IS commonly known among certain circles but kept from the mainstream. But as soon as you want to learn more, go deeper, then you have to leave the broad world of Conspiracies and head into a more specific field where the actual researchers in that specific domain are doing the cutting edge research — i.e. anthropology, economics, religious studies, etc.

What I noticed is that no matter where I went and what I studied, everything seemed to lead to the same conclusion: there is a mass global conspiracy going on by a very small group of elites who know a whole lot more about the world we live and the history of this world than the common person does, and they use this knowledge to gain and keep power and control the masses. Makes sense. Nothing new there. Though much of the latest data was new to me. It was good to catch up. But further down the rabbit hole you begin to hit this — what i would call — “dead zone”…. a place where ALL the documentaries tend to freeze… they are TRYING to tell you something, they desperately WANT to tell you something… but they just aren’t sure WHAT to tell you. Because everyone has either their own viewpoint or their own agenda OR they simply don’t know anything beyond their own personal conclusion.

For example, many of these theories tend to stop at the “the elites who one might call The Illuminati control the world are all satanists who worship Lucifer who is actually The Lord of Light and not really a bad person but they are using this power and all the secret technologies they possess to keep the masses down through the New World Order and stay in control of the world” idea. Okay fine. We know that. That’s their big conclusion. Leading governments, the royals and the Catholic Church are all occultists and/or satanist. Great. We already know that. They possess secret knowledge and these are the signs and symbols of this whole charade etc etc. Okay so that’s sort of the beginner stage. But then it just stops. They tend to end there and go off into a new age lala land of outlandish presumptions or pie in the sky fairytales about how one day the people will be able to take control of the world back through either raising mass consciousness or through mass global revolution. Yep. One can see that happening as well.

But if you look carefully enough through all the various information that’s out there you start to notice one or two very interesting ideas that don’t really get dissected down too much, at least not on the surface: and that is the idea that the human race was not created by a capital G God, but rather by lower case g gods, nor were we descended from early hominids ala evolution theory, but rather we were created initially as a slave race by an extraterrestrial group of beings.

As you might remember I first came upon this idea in ONE book in 1995. That was it. Then this whole Ancient Alien theory really began to take off over the last ten to fifteen years. To the point where it has it’s own mainstream TV show — at least here in the Americas. So it’s reached the mainstream now. Back when i first read it, it seemed like such a foreign concept to me, that I must admit that I just sort of decided to leave it alone for the time being. I didn’t see how it could really help or benefit me in any way to know that. Plus it really bumped up against my own theological and spiritual viewpoints and practices.

Fast forward 19 years and here we are. You may remember a few years ago when I decided to read the whole bible. Circa 2005 to 2007. Every now and then I would post something to the social networks about how crazy it was or how illogical it was or how made up it all seemed, etc. But there were a few sticking points for sure. Such as if God made just Adam and Eve, and they had these two sons, Cain and Abel, where did these other women come from that Cain and Abel married? Things like that. Simple logical things. Obviously there is only one answer if one is to follow this path of thinking: Eve’s sons made love to Eve and she gave birth to a few females, who would have been Cain and Abel’s sisters and they in turn also became their wives as well. In other words the entire human race was borne from incest. Strange and disturbing to say the least.

But then you go deeper. You begin to study the ancient texts where the Torah (the Old Testament portion of the Bible) actually came from. And that’s where it gets really interesting. You begin to discover little known and discussed facts like the fact that the Book of Genesis is actually two or more different books combined — totally separate books written by two totally different people at two different times. But they are so similar to each other PLUS we aren’t sure which one was written first, so biblical scholars just combine them together to make one book. That’s why many of the stories in the Torah and the Bible are told twice, but often contradict each other. Most Jews and Christians aren’t even aware of this, and if they are they just decide not to think about it. Frankly this whole sphere is so filled with anomalies like this that one can easily see how and why most Christians and Jews do not bother to even acknowledge or entertain these facts — they probably don’t even bother recognizing them consciously. Only scholars do. Because It’s simply too mind boggling to most people.

Here’s one that has always boggled me and has continued to stick my attention for years: All through the beginning of the book of Genesis, this “god” continues to speak of himself as if there is more than one of him. He uses the pronouns “us” and “we” and “ourselves” as if he/she is speaking to a group of people. It’s quite odd. And it’s right there in plain site for anyone to read and see. Now before we go on let us acknowledge that 99% of religious leaders out there, people who we call pastors or preachers or priests or rabbis or ministers are NOT invested in studying or researching to gain knowledge or get to the bottom of any great mysteries. That’s not their mission or goal. Their goal is to provide spiritual or religious leadership and pastoral guidance and comfort to their congregation. So they may know certain things… but they don’t tend to know the deep scholarly stuff or the latest cutting edge academic research.

There is also the problem with anthropology. This whole theory of evolution that states that human beings evolved from lower form apes and hominids, BUT they have all these giant missing pieces — they call it “the missing link” — that WOULD prove they were right IF they could only find evidence of other species or animals that they could fit in between we Homo sapiens and these earlier hominids like homo erectus or homo habilus or cromagnun man etc. The problem is that they just don’t have any physical evidence of any of this being true.

Next let’s jump back over to the religious and history books for a moment. Turns out that real scholars — ones withOUT an agenda to prove that the religions of the world are true or accurate or even real — have known for centuries that the Judeo Christian sacred writings that we call the bible etc are actually ancient texts taken from earlier ancient texts from the Sumerians, the Phoenicians, the Babylonians, the Persians and the Medes. The Jews may think that they invented this God and these stories — the Israelites actually. But scholars know that they didn’t. They were just copying the work of other more ancient peoples that they came into contact with. Even ideas such as the creation story and the creation of human beings etc etc.

By this point scholars can even tell you WHICH ancient texts most of these writings come from. It’s incredible how much progress ALL of these different fields of study have made over the last ten to fifty years. From genetics to religious to history to anthropological studies, each of the different fields have made incredible gains in what we know about the history of the world we live and our own history.

In a nutshell, human beings were evidently first created about about 200,000 years ago initially as a slave race by the Anunnaki — a more advanced extraterrestrial race of beings who originally came from a planet known as Nibiru, which happens to actually exist in our own solar system but our scientists have just not discovered it yet. Before you scoff, bare in mind that these SAME ancient Sumerian texts also tell of there being one or two extra planets in our solar system — whereas we have always known there to just be 9 in total — and over the last ten years sure enough scientists have indeed discovered two more planets in our solar system, — I believe the first one they called Sedna and the second one just discovered this year VP2012…(but check on that…) making the total count now 11 total planets in our solar system. Who would have ever thought that the number of planets in our solar system would be different when we were adults compared to when we were children? That fact alone is enough to make anyone remotely intelligent at least consider to start to rethink everything we’ve been taught about our origins.

If one reads the Bible or the Torah with this NEW understanding of what it is actually writing about — OR better still, goes back to the original source material, the ancient texts of the Sumerians and Babylonians, and starts rereading with this new understanding of what and WHO they were actually writing about these texts make a LOT more sense. It’s not some giant wrathful vengeful God in the sky who was bored and lonely and thus created humankind out of nothingness who wants us to now worship him or he’ll send us to hell for an eternity. This is all just garbage that lower minded humans added onto these ancient writings because, one, they either forgot what the real story was, or two, as some conspiracy theorists claim, they did KNOW what the ancient texts really meant, but they hid the real meaning of the stories from the people and invented this giant god in the sky figure and all the baggage that goes along with him — like religion and heaven and hell and other such rewards and punishment ideas — in order to control the majority of the people on earth through fear of the unknown and fear of the afterlife. It makes perfect sense.

In fact, do it yourself. Go back and start rereading the Torah or the Bible based on this new idea of WHO the “gods” were and WHY they created us and HOW they created us. It all starts to make a LOT more sense.

Here’s the deal: My intention here over the next few days, weeks, months or years is not to try to explain this to you the reader or anyone else, nor to try to prove it; there’s way too much evidence now out there in such a wide variety of different fields of human study to doubt these theories. The idea of evolution, at least to me now, is a joke. But more likely it’s a hoax being perpetrated on purpose to steer us away from learning the true nature of the origins of human beings. And the same can be said about the more mainstream theories of religious origins, i.e. a God created human beings because he was bored or lonely. Again, it’s always seemed rather silly to say the least… BUT we’ve made it seem plausible by attaching higher ideals to it such as “divine consciousness” etc etc. No. None of it now to me even seems plausible now that I have learned what I have learned.

But rather than try to explain it here OR try to prove it, I will use this space here in the Transcendence Diaries to just make my own notes and ask my own questions. What I will also do is cite sources and resources so anyone can begin to study the same materials I have been studying over the last few months and years which will allow them to decide for themselves what they believe.

If you’re interested in starting to dive into this research yourself, check out this VERY basic playlist that I created here: http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7Cl0OHflU1JAElAKLXd3g8JCDu2LL6_z
At the very least it gives you a starting place or launching pad.

Questions that have arisen for me are the following:

Since we’ve made so much progress in this research over the last 20 years (which I hadn’t realized), do ANY modern religious scholars KNOW what’s really up? I’m referring to Christian, Judaic & Islamic scholars associated with actual churches or religions, NOT academics… (The academics are the ones spearheading this research. Clearly they know exactly what’s what.) But what about more mainstream religious leaders who also happen to be highly intelligent and/or curious…. Do THEY know what the Torah & Bible are really talking about & really referring to? Are some of them hiding the truth from their “flock”? Or are they too as clueless as everyone else is/was? That’s what I keep coming back to…

And let us say that this now-new but once-old and readily-known theory of the origins of human beings IS true… Does that discount or exclude the idea that a capital G GOD exists? Wouldn’t these ancient beings, the Anunnaki, still have to have been created at some point in time way back when? Sure they may be way more advanced than WE are and they’ve been in existence for a lot longer in the universe than we have, but they still need an origin as well. Someone or something still would have had to create them. THIS is something to contemplate.

What it comes down to, still, for me, is that consciousness still is the most likely source of ALL creation, both matter and energy. rather than coming from or out of matter and energy, consciousness gives life shape and form to matter and energy. So yes even more advanced civilizations — some that may have created we human beings — were still at some point created from a higher consciousness, just as the universe itself was at some point.

In other words, on a deeper level, WHEN we pray — if one prays that is, just WHO are we praying to? If we were in fact genetically engineered as a slave race by a more advanced species of beings, THEY would be (and ARE according to cutting edge modern religious scholars) the “gods” that all of these holy books were written about, all of these creation stories are actually about this more advanced species — to ancient earthlings they certainly would seem like “gods”. So now when we pray, assuming all this time that it was to capital G God, are we REALLY praying to God? Or can we not even be sure really that a capital G God really exists? Frankly at this point this is something that I believe that each of us is going to have to explore on our own — within our own consciousness — in order to try to discover what turns out to be true to us. More of a psychic or meditative practice in our own personal consciousness and hopefully through which we can eventually tap into some form of a higher cosmic consciousness in order to really learn what’s really going on.

This is what I hope to do on my own through my own meditative practices and prayer. As always I will take notes here in the Diaries.

PS — I am currently reworking the book/presentation “Not Quite The Meaning of Life and Everything In Between” — something I hadn’t worked on since 2008. It’s a more visual presentation dealing with and explaining these same ideas about cosmology and consciousness etc.

 

 

Does Matter Come From Mind? Or Mind Come From Matter?

A note: The post below is based on a variety of information sources and data taken from throughout human history and studied and researched over the last 25 years. The reader is assumed to have already encountered and studied the majority of this information. If one encounters something that they’re not familiar with, a suggestion might be to take a note of it and continue reading.
 
 Two things. We’re already familiar with evolutionary theory and with creationism. The new form of creationism that’s received a lot of fanfare over the last 10 years is something they now call intelligent design. Creationism and intelligent design usually refer to both humanity and the world in general being created by some sort of a divine being capital D such as a god or goddess.
 
 Of course there is also another theory of creationism and that is what it has now come to be known as the ancient alien theory of creationism which posits that rather than a singular God that created the entire universe, a collection of extraterrestrial beings from another world other than Earth actually created humankind. In the most popular theory about ancient alien creationism is that the human race was created as a slave race by extraterrestrial beings (simply meaning “not of this earth”) who came from Sirius B star system. We could call them “Siriuns”.
 
 This theory is an old one. I first heard it proposed back in 1995 when we are still but children and have continued to study it over the last 20 years. There is a ton of evidence, if one is looking for it, and depending on one’s perspective, that portends to prove this ancient alien theory may be accurate. And there are a variety of different theories out there proposing that humankind was created by extraterrestrials or aliens, each with their own idea of from which star system these extraterrestrials originally came. Where they were from or where they currently live now is important, and indeed is fascinating to research and contemplate. But it’s not the main theme of this post.
 
 Number one: Here’s an important point. Even if we were to assume that this is true – that the human race is nothing but a slave race created by more advanced extraterrestrial beings and we have now evolved beyond a slave mentality and beyond even remembering our origin – this still does not exclude the idea of an even more divine being creating the entire universe. This would’ve just happened before that time period. Someone or something still would have had to create not only the universe but the extraterrestrials who created human beings. So regardless of which theory one chooses to believe in — a God created human beings or extraterrestrials created human beings, it still does not solve the ultimate question, i.e. How did the universe itself get here and who or what might have created it?
 
 We now assume, the majority of us at least, that the entirety of the known (and unknown?) universe is approximately 15 billion years old. Of course this exact figure is also arguable; everything is. But that’s not the question at hand either.
 
 Number two: The real question ultimately is this: can mind ever come from matter? As evolutionary theorists propose? Or can matter only come from mind?
 
 It is easy to be an evolutionist. The majority of intelligent people on earth now tend to believe in it. Theoretically it makes sense. And there appears to be an ever growing body of physical evidence to support it. On earth that is. Especially on earth. Fossil records etc. This is something most evolutionists seem to totally miss: almost all evidence regarding evolution theory is based on earth based life forms and materials — an infinitesimally small piece of the total universe. They totally miss the rest of the much larger picture — the hundreds of billions of other galaxies and star systems in the world we live in.
 
 Granted, in the greater known universe, in the world of astro-physicists, a simple reading of the history of radio waves that permeate the seeming “empty space” of the universe reveals that it has been expanding — a fact that can be viewed as “evolutionary” to a certain degree. Scientists take this rate of expansion and reverse it and this is how they come to decide how long the universe has been existence. It’s just the rate of expansion times the distance covered in reverse. Eventually they reach a point where everything in the entire universe is all crammed together no bigger than the size of an atom. Before that…?
 
 Well that’s where we get the idea of the so called Big Bang. The idea that matter itself just mysteriously and miraculously bursted into being from nothing. This is where evolutionary theory hits it’s arch nemesis, namely logic. Because we all know that nothing can come from nothing. Matter cannot come from nothing or nowhere. It can only come from something. This is how and from where Thomas Aquinas got his “a priori” / “first cause” argument. So at least according to some, it’s an impossibility to consider that all of this something came into being from nothing.
 
 Others persist in asserting that they believe that matter can indeed miraculously come forth from absolutely nothing at all. The operating word here being “believe”. Because at this point (in human history at least) we don’t have any evidence to support either theory. The truth is we human beings simply do not know what happened before the universe began expanding. We don’t know how IT — that tiny microscopic ball of matter that expanded exponentially into everything in the known and unknown universe including ourselves — got here, or how IT came into being, or what it was before it was. We just have theories.
 
 But beyond this argument of matter coming into being from nothing is another deeper question. The one posed before: can mind or consciousness come from matter? We have been speaking of matter. Not life. Remember, scientists postulate that it was the universe itself that first came into being 15 billion years ago. Not life. The star at the center of our solar system, what we call “the sun” (curious that we have a name for all these different stars in the universe when in reality they don’t really have names…), has only been in existence for 4.6 billion years. The earth for only 4.5 billion. The earliest life forms that we know of, simple single-celled microbes, for approximately 3.5 billion years. And human beings? Approximately only 200,000 years.
 
 Why is this important? Because human beings, out of either ego or limited knowledge and ignorance, are the only life forms that we humans currently know of so far in our research that have “mind” or consciousness, i.e. an awareness of being. And we don’t know of any other instances where mind has come from pure unconscious matter. From a purely logical point of view it seems unlikely, mind coming from matter.
 
 Indeed it was this quote, by philosopher Harry Palmer, that first inspired me to read all his works and then take all the Avatar Courses: “The miracle is not that there is consciousness in the universe, but that there is a universe in consciousness”. For whatever reason this made sense to my young mind at the time. I had always thought of us as being inside the universe. As parts and pieces of it. Operating inside of it. It was only then that I began to contemplate the idea that even the universe itself must be inside of consciousness, because after all the universe is just more matter and anything material at its origin must come from some form of consciousness. Matter does not just originate out of nothingness.
 
 Sure it breeds from itself. Evolutionarily speaking, matter begets more matter, as we’ve seen from studying the evolution of life on earth and even non living matter in the near and far away universe. But initially this matter must have come into being from some form of consciousness. A mind or consciousness could not have emanated originally from lifeless matter. Or could it?
 
 That really is the question. And the truth is we do not as of yet have the answer.

Free Will Versus Astrology

One of the longtime astrologers I used for many years, a beautiful soul, and well known celeb in that small world, by the name of Karen Pavlus, passed on a few years ago. I miss her. She wasn’t just “great at what she did”, but she was also a good person, caring and kind hearted. Because I tend to believe that a chart reading is only as good as the person doing the reading, I have not had my progress chart pulled or read since 2007. Karen was very good at what she did. Uncanny really. Knew things that were spot on that someone could only know IF someone else told them about it… But she saw these things in the charts. She’d ask me out of the blue, “You’re working on some project that has to do with writing, perhaps a new book, along with three Virgos…Do you know what I’m talking about?” And I’d respond, “Uh… Yeah… I’m writing a book right now with three different friends who are all Virgos! How do you know that?!” She’d just exhale and laugh and reply, “Well it’s not rocket science honey. I can see it right here in your chart…” Things like that… There’s just no explaining it away. It’s a valid science, or art, or whatever one wants to label it.

Now of course, I may tend to believe this more than the average person, simply because I was raised around this kind of thing since I was born. My whole family was into it, probably for hundreds or even thousands of years. It’s only in the last 100 years that humanity has steered away from regularly using and considering astrology as a viable science; once that split came about between astrology and astronomy. Which was a good thing. To be sure. But it doesn’t necessarily negate the validity of astrology. It just separates them into two different camps. One focuses on examining the universe as a whole, looking for the latest “truths” that can further our understanding of the universe and everything in it; and one focuses on how the movement of certain celestial bodies in the sky affect us and everything else around us.

As a kid I remember reading and flipping through books by people such as Edgar Cayce, Linda Goodman, Ruth Montgomery, Nostradamus and numerous others since before I could walk. All of these so-called paranormal and supernatural books intrigued me to no end. It was as if two distinct worlds existed: the mainstream world out THERE… what we see on TV and read in magazines and hear about in school, and this other secret world that I was reading about in these books, where people could read minds and see the future and channel spirits. The two worlds didn’t seem to connect in any way. The mainstream world didn’t seem to know anything about this other supernatural world that existed. But the supernatural world seemed to know everything about the mainstream world. People had been predicting events to come for thousands of years. Some people knew this. Most people didn’t.

My grandparents had psychics on retainer, the same way one keeps an accountant or an attorney on retainer. Whenever someone in the family would get sick, or get into any kind of trouble or turmoil, my grandfather would tell my grandmother, “Deary get Ruby on the phone.” Ruby was one of my grandparents’ primary long-time psychics. They’d speak with her and dig into the situation a little bit, usually not needing to say anything more than “Can you see what’s happening with Sister?” Sister is what they used to call my mom. And sure enough Ruby would then begin to just explain exactly what was happening in her life as if she was living with us for months; she knew what was happening, she knew why it was happening; and she could usually see the various possibilities for its outcome. It was always mind-boggling to me that these women possessed this skill. To be fair, a little later in life I met many others, some of whom were men. So it isn’t necessarily a gender thing.

Needless to say, because of these experiences early on, I have always had a strong belief in our potential to have these abilities. Since those days, I have spoken to countless psychics. Some are great. Some are average. And some just aren’t any good at all. Usually you can tell how good one is simply by how easy or hard it is to get an appointment with them. A good one, like John Edward or Hans Christian King, is very hard to get an appointment with. They may have waiting lists that go out a full year just to speak with them for an hour. The good ones always do. (And yes, if you’re more in the public eye, it is usually easier to get yourself an appointment slipped in. That’s just how it is. One of the perks of living life publicly as opposed to privately I assume. Why I’m really not sure. Money certainly never guides their decision making process. None of them seem the least bit concerned with money. I think it’s nothing more than just intrigue frankly. They’re as intrigued to speak with us as we are to speak with them… Sometimes. Sometimes they don’t seem to give a s*t. Which i respect too.)

Because of the nature of my job, I have been very lucky to have connected with and become friends with some of the most well-known or “famous” psychics, mediums, channelers, working today. Hans Christian King, Micki Dahne, John Edward, Echo Bodine et al….. they’re all wonderful people. And very gifted. I have just recently gotten to know Steven Forest — who seems like a very nice person. Very real, down to earth, sincere and kind-hearted. To me, each of these beautiful people proves that there is more to this so-called phenomenon than pure luck or chance. We just have not yet discovered the scientific mechanism(s) at play that make it work. There is a “something” there that renders it totally plausible that what they do is measurably verifiable, that it isn’t just a fluke. Luckily there are numerous scientific organizations around the world now that are attempting to pin down exactly what is scientifically happening inside these gifted people that makes it possible for them to do these incredible things. ( See Noetic Institute or Dr. Rupert Sheldrake to name just two off the top of my head…) It’s only a matter of time before we understand the science behind it as well as we do the inner-workings of the atom or why the universe is expanding. Once it’s verified by science, then I believe even hardcore mainstreamers, skeptics and rationalists will succumb and start acknowledging that it’s no more “supernatural” than gravity or magnetism is.

After a while one begins to understand full well the difference between a “psychic” and an astrologer… I actually tend to trust the readings of good astrologers more than “psychics”. The primary reason why is two-fold: number one, psychics tend to read minds. They have mastered the art of accessing and using our Intuitive Mode of Consciousness. We ALL have access to this viewpoint — the viewpoint of Intuitive Mode. But not many of us can access it easily. Doing so enables them to both read minds AND see the future, some of them at least. So the reading is going to be influenced by whatever the person they are doing the reading for is thinking, feeling, afraid of or hoping for at the time. This isn’t a foolproof system. In fact, it’s far from it. The reading can be too compromised because of this. Another factor is that psychics tend to have a real problem with “time”; they can SEE what’s going to happen, but they can’t tell WHEN it is…. they “see” or “feel” or see visions of different things, different events… but it’s difficult for them to ascertain WHEN these things are going to actually HAPPEN. They may be telling you about something that is going to happen ten years from now… Not very helpful in the here-now. And sometimes they might even be “seeing” something that has already happened. Helpful if you still have something to integrate about that event and need more clarity on it, but not very helpful if you’re looking for insight into things in the here-now.

Still another reason is because astrologers if they’re GOOD, JUST read the charts. They don’t add anything from their own personal perspective. They just practice the science of reading the charts. Psychics cannot help but add their own ideas and feelings… So the reading is also going to be limited to that. Astrologers tend to give the same reading over and over again regarding the same time period because they’re again, just reading a chart. Why should the information change? It shouldn’t. But a psychic I have noticed might give a completely different reading regarding the same time period a day or two later… Why? Because again they are reading the mind of the person, as opposed to just reading a chart. Sticking to the science.

Of course a good astrologer is only as good as their chart reading capabilities are. And that’s key. That’s the difference between one who is good and one who is GREAT. Experience seems to play a really important role in it. And so too does even a slight gift in terms of being able to tap into that Intuitive Mode of Consciousness. Being able to tap into the mind of the person even just a little seems to really help. But not enough where they are reading your mind. Then you might as well be speaking with a psychic. Psychics tend to care too much or at least pay attention too much to what the person on the other end wants or hopes for or fears. These things should NOT play a role in a good reading. After all, we are speaking to them precisely because we want to get OUT of our own heads and get some objective third-party feedback from another. I’ve found that a great astrologer is just as difficult to find as a good doctor or anything else. There are tens of thousands of them out there (hundreds of thousands perhaps?). But the good ones really stand out. Unfortunately 90% (perhaps higher…?) of them are average at best. Karen, the one I mention above, was fantastic. That’s why I haven’t spoken to one since she died. Just haven’t had the time to do the research necessary to find another really good one. (Until these last couple of weeks that is. Which is what compelled me to write this post… More on that later…)

But what about free will? Aren’t we capable of creating our own experiences through our beliefs? Yes, of course we are. (As a sidenote, even this idea is foreign to most people. Tell them that it is THEY who are creating all of their experiences based on what they BELIEVE and most will tell you that you’re crazy. That’s taking way too much responsibility for most people. But let us assume that for this post, we take it for granted that each of us is creating our lives, all of the experiences in our lives, based on our beliefs…) So how can astrology have any credence whatsoever if we are creating our lives and have “free will”? THAT’s the quandary isn’t it?  I personally DO give more credit to free will, good decision making, healthy actions and mental/emotional/spiritual state than any influence that celestial bodies may exert on our day to day lives.  I still believe that these celestial influences CAN at the very least give us insight into various “possibilities”… things that MAY or MAY NOT happen to us… But it is WE who make that decision.

Astrology –regardless of HOW it works…(my guess is that it has something to do with gravity, the gravitational influence that celestial bodies exert on us — physically emotionally and mentally, just as the moon’s gravitational force exerts an influence on the earth’s ocean tides…) — has an uncanny ability to tell us WHO we are and who we are NOT. If one can get their hands on a good reading of their Natal Chart and get to know themselves early on, they can then begin to focus on making the most use of their strengths and as on minimizing their possible weaknesses. After a few years, overcoming one’s innate weaknesses or challenges, one is what is known as “evolved”. If a person has knowledge of their own Natal Chart and has spent considerable time perfecting themselves, overcoming weaknesses and challenges and temptations, they are called “evolved” in the world of astrology. “Unevolved” if they have yet to explore this data. Some people of course don’t need to learn about such things from astrology; they just become aware of it from an early age and decide from then on to not fall prey to being tempted by these potential weaknesses. Thus a person can be “evolved” in the world of astrology withOUT having to be familiar with their Natal Chart or even know what “sign” they are. Self improvement IS after all self improvement. And it doesn’t matter how one gets there.

But in terms of real enlightenment, really “BEING THERE”, it certainly helps to have it all laid out in front of you. Strengths, weaknesses, temptations, fears, tendencies, skills, gifts, talents, all the various possibilities of what makes you YOU. We can then be very deliberate about changing what it is that we DON”T like about ourselves and improving aspects of ourselves that we do like or think are fabulous. True Superhero stuff. One doesn’t talk to an astrologer in order to be told what’s GOING to happen. One talks to an astrologer in order to find out what MIGHT happen. Potentialities. Free Will is still at play. Perhaps it’s the strongest force in the universe. The Will. Astrology just helps gives us insight into what our various strengths and weaknesses are AND into timing. As it is said, there is a time for sowing, a time for reaping, a time for every season under heaven. Imagine being able to KNOW when the BEST time for such and such might be. We have all heard plenty of stories about someone being warned that between one date and another that there is a high likelihood of them being in some kind of accident, so they are extra careful during that period and sure enough they “almost get into an accident” but because they were careful, they are okay; they survive.

[Of course there is a question begged here as to just WHAT caused the accident…. Was it “written in the stars” and the astrologer just happened to “see it” and hence it happened just as they predicted? Or did it only transpire because the person was told about it and then created it because the worm had already been implanted in their mind? That’s one that has boggled philosophers since time began. Since almost everyone in the world gets into one or more accidents in their life, regardless of whether or not they ever speak with an astrologer or not, I would tend to lean towards believing that the astrologer just “saw” that it was potentiating at that specific time and the person was able to avoid it due to knowing about it beforehand. But that’s just me. Like most things in this life, it’s probably a healthy combination of both possibilities that contributes to this phenomenon.]

We have to remember that regardless of how accurate an astrological reading IS for someone, it is still THEY who determine WHO they are and what happens to them. My own personal belief is that the more information we have to work with, the better it is for us. If I am told that I “have an uncanny gift of communication and I thrive in the public” and I’m spending most of my time alone working on repairing car engines, I’m probably not making the best use of my time or innate abilities. Or vice versa. Chances are if I switched to doing something more involved with the communication and the public I would just generally feel better, be happier, and through that I would in turn help more people just from being happier. This to me is really the key to it all. We already know that there is no better way to feel good than to be in service. But we’ve also learned that there is no better way to be in service than when we feel good and are happy.

[As a footnote, I do NOT believe that a person can do a very good job at reading their OWN charts — UNLESS they literally do that for a living and have mastered the art and skill of it. (And even then, it would seem to me that there still might be some “dissonance” in the reading one might give themselves simply because it would be very difficult for anyone to be completely objective when reading their own chart. How can we help but infuse our own personal desires, hopes, dreams, fears, resistances, fantasies and other real and imagined ideas and feelings into the reading…?) Hence I have never bothered to take the time to focus on trying to “master” astrological chart reading myself, but instead I leave it to others who specialize in it. But that’s just me.]

Lent: Is Giving Something Up Easier Than Adding Something?

As many know, for Lent this year I decided to “add something” rather than give something up.
 
 

We’re going to get a little random here, because I still hold to the belief, previously stated both here and on various social media vehicles, that for all the myriad benefits of social media, one of its detractions is that it encourages us to sometimes forego updating our blogs — a more temporary place setting in space-time, and instead just pour out our thoughts and emotions on some social media platform instead — easy convenient and instant gratification yes, but a very temporary and unorganized place. Not the best place to lay down one’s deepest innermost feelings, best kept secrets or most interesting observations.
 
 The key is to use discernment; if it’s a passing thought of little substance, one that can be communicated in 140 characters or less that will never compel a desire for retreival from anyone for anything, then social media it is. But for everything else, a blog is still the proper home to house such things; lest we forget that a blog is already a step down the data communication and archiving ladder when it comes to permanence and perhaps even sentiment and import, compared to say the book or letter format. The problem still being that uploading those aforementioned thoughts feelings and observations is much easier to do on social media than in a blog.
 
 For whatever reason we humans now at this time carry a belief that anything goes on social media– proper grammar, punctuation, full sentences and well thought out ideas be damned. Hence our near immediate mutual love and almost unanimous embrace of it. Likewise there is still a belief one can feel rumbling in mass consciousness that ours blogs still maintain a sense of order and propriety and an adherence to protocol that is all but lost on social media. This is probably a healthy and helpful belief. It just takes longer to get one’s message across.

 
 With that said I have found that the secret is to occasionally treat the blog post as one would a social media update; just let it all out with more focus on getting the points across and less focus on the rules of style propriety or protocol. Which is what we’ll be doing here today.
 
 Without fail once winter begins to come to an end the western world is abuzz with discussions of what everyone has decided to give up or commit to for Lent. It’s similar to New Years resolutions in that regard, though I dare say I believe that a larger majority of people seem to be able to complete their Lenten missions compared to sticking to their New Years resolutions. It used to always be the same, no matter where you were in the world: most people speak of giving up sugar or alcohol or caffeine or soda. Those are the big ones the most popular.
 
 Over the last few years though — and I admit that this might have more to do with the changing circles I hang out in than a general shift in mainstream society — Lenten disciplines have become much more evolved and thought out, more nuanced. Gone are the days of people simply announcing they’re going to give up sugar for 40 days and then making excuses for the few or many occasions they’re unable to keep the commitment. (The other day someone announced to a room of us that they were told that “you’re allowed to cheat on Fridays for Lent.” That was a new one to me. And totally misses the point of even bothering to do it in the first place if you ask me.) But that now seems more like the exception rather than the norm.
 
 Say what one will about drone strikes and imperialism, campaign financing gone amuck, political corruption, increased violence selfishness and materialism in society and gratuitous sex gore and vulgarity in our arts and entertainment… All true unfortunately. But there is at the same time still a growing trend towards a deeper spirituality in the United States. A palpable longing for a more sincere authenticity. One that belies and seems ironically counterintuitive to the increased cynicism reflected in our entertainment. We’re in a strange place at the moment. Like Tweens. So ready to grow up, but still so caught up in the toils troubles toys and habits of our youth.
 
 (I believe the core reason for this seeming dichotomy is fear. Fear of being vulnerable. We wear our cynicism on our sleeves as a badge of honor, as a warning to everyone around us that we haven’t fallen off the wagon or given up yet, for fear of being caught off guard by those who are less motivated by morals and values and instead purely motivated by greed and profit. Our cynical outerwear protects us from being taken advantage of. So we believe. It shows the world that we’re tough and just as hardened as the next tribe. Ready to fight or defend at any moments notice.
 
 Yet in our underbelly lies a great spiritual longing for more honesty, more sincerity, more tolerance and compassion, more true authenticity and connection with one another. Which side will win out in the end? That’s the question… If we continue to draw war and conflict into our collective lives, as our (s)elected political leaders seem want to do at the moment, then we will surely bring about yet another war with our neighbors that will complete the hardening process for another generation or two at the least and say goodbye to all the progress we’ve made on our path towards enlightenment. War tends to do that to civilizations. If we can somehow manage to avoid this plight, then we may just evolve right out of this mundane and childish propensity to battle anyone who disagrees in the slightest with us or happens to possess something we don’t have but want.
 
 But this evolution is going to take a continued commitment on our part to keep encouraging those around us to step up and honor that same feeling of desire for more maturity and enlightenment that we are sure now everyone can feel tugging at their heart strings.
 
 This new trend toward a more detailed and thought out Lenten discipline cycle is a sign of this collective longing in mass consciousness. People who aren’t even necessarily practicing Christians are getting in on the act. And those who are are no longer satisfied with just “giving up sugar” for Lent. The new trend is to go much deeper; to “add something”. People are committing to “unplugging” (from all technology) every night in order to spend more time with family; or committing to more quiet devotional time; to daily forgiveness; or to mentoring on a weekly basis or a weekly practice of some form of service to others. Long gone are the days when Lent just meant “not drinking alcohol for a few weeks except on Friday nights.
 
 Having already spent countless years giving things up for Lent, this year I decided to add something. But what? For me it was simple: stay a good Christian/Avatar Wizard. Remember who I am and how much time and energy I’ve spent honing these skills and qualities that make up a good Christian and Avatar Wizard. (The two are not connected in any way. Though to those of us who happen to be religious, whether Jewish or Buddhist or Muslim or christian, they fit together perfectly.) it isn’t about how much time or energy I’ve spent learning the knowledge and honing the skills nor even cultivating the characteristics of such a person as much as it is the desire to be such a person. That’s the real motivation.
 
 One of the ways I would do that would be to commit to communicating or connecting with the Divine at least three separate times per day. Call it prayer. Or meditation. It doesn’t matter what we call it. It’s the turning everything else off to stop for a moment and connect with that higher force in the universe and then communicate with it. A lot of prayer for others. A lot of prayer for the connection itself. A lot of prayer for knowledge, the kind of knowledge one can only acquire through an intuitive connection with something much bigger than ourselves. Much grander and/or greater in size and scope.
 
 While I must admit I have gotten a lot out of this practice so far, I haven’t been able to keep to it as much as I wanted to or expected to. Some days go by and I don’t even remember to do it until the very end of the day when I’m in bed and way past sleepy. This surprised me. I actually thought it would be easy. But it hasn’t been. It’s actually been quite difficult. I keep wondering if half the reason for giving something up is to act as a constant reminder OF THAT commitment and in return we would automatically connect and communicate with the Divine more often just to help us stay committed to NOT doing whatever it is we gave up. I know that’s pretty much the idea behind giving something up that we love — it forces us to relate more readily to Jesus of Nazareth and reminds us of all of his sacrifices. (I feel like for those who aren’t christian one could substitute Jesus with The Buddha or Ghandi or Lao Tzu or even Abraham… The point being that these exemplary humans serve to act as a catalyst to reach a greater connection to the inexplicable Divine force that flows through all things in the known and unknown universe…)
 
 But that for next year. And honestly one is well aware that we don’t even need Lent or any other manmade holiday for such a practice. For what man of substance isn’t already practicing this on a daily basis every day of their lives anyway? In the meantime I awoke this morning with the realization that the one thing I did commit to this Lent was to mentor a young man –meeting with him for an hour at least once a week for six weeks — throughout Lent while he takes his Confirmation classes, to act as a friend and guide on his way becoming Confirmed in the church on Easter Sunday. This particular discipline I have been able to follow through with and keep to it. Sort of snuck up on me. Didn’t even see it as a Lenten practice until today, nearly five weeks in. In that there has been a necessity for prayer and connection with the Divine simply because I am acutely aware of the fact that I am nothing but a physical vehicle for the Divine to speak to and work with this boy. So I constantly pray for guidance to make sure that I am communicating everything to this young man that God wishes to get across to him. So I am in turn benefitting as much as the “Confirmand” is. A bonus to be sure.
 
 But I must admit that next year I will seriously consider giving something up during Lent to see if it better serves to keep me more committed to communicating with the Divine more frequently than I have been able to this year. Not that I am complaining. I’m not. It’s been a wonderfully fulfilling Lent so far. And I am more convinced of a divine intelligence at work and play in the universe than I’ve ever been before.
 
 
 
 
 

The Evolution of Organics

There was a time when deciding to eat all organic drew a deep line in the sand between you and the small group you hung out with and “everyone else”. For the last 20 years we’ve talked about this more than a lot. They watch TV, listen to Top 40 radio, follow sports, believe they’re either a Democrat or a Republican, and shop at regular grocery stores. They’ve never tripped on LSD or any hallucinogens for that matter. They don’t see a problem with marijuana being illegal but they “get together to have drinks” a few times a week. They don’t know who Ram Dass is, but know and love Oprah. They think Avatar is a movie. They doubt “taking vitamins” really does anything and they aren’t sold on why they need to eat only organic food. They think that because their doctor told them to do something that it makes it okay.

Every now and then we come into contact with these people. We have to on occasion. They find out that you “fast” or “juice” or “take vitamins” and they might say something like “I’ve always wanted to know more about “living more organically” and taking vitamins and all that….” They have organic food confused with taking nutritional supplements and they call all nutritional supplements “vitamins”, even though health conscious people barely take any actual “vitamins” because we get them from our food. But that’s the term that’s stuck in their head. But you do your best to answer their questions with respect and the open heart and honest eyes of a child so as not to offend and truly serve in that moment.

But things change. The lines are starting to blur. We’ve grown. We’ve all grown. We never used to shop at “regular grocery stores”. Only “they” did. But a funny thing happened. Just as the big chain health food stores started slowly taking over the market from smaller mom and pop health food stores, so too did the products they carry start to become less and less health conscious and more and more profit conscious. Most of them are publicly traded now. So you can just as easily find a non-organic product on their shelves as you can an organic one. Ironically at the same time, big chain “regular grocery stores” started carrying organic products in addition to regular people food. It started first with eggs, then cream, then almond milk and soy milk started being added. Now depending on what city you live in you might be able to shop at a so called regular grocery store and be able to find just about everything you want organic.

This is a huge change. For people who have only recently started eating only organic food in the last few years, it may not fly right over their heads. But for those who have been eating organic for a decade or more, it’s a downright astounding transformation in society. Princess Little Tree loves shopping at a place called Trade Joes. From what I gather, because I don’t do grocery shopping and hence don’t know much about it, Trader Joes is kind of a cross between a health food store and a gourmet store. You certainly won’t find any GMO food there. Labeling unnecessary. And you won’t have a problem walking out with a full cart of organic food. But the other day I accompanied Little Tree to a regular grocery store on our way home from somewhere; where I don’t remember. Yes even the best of us may pick up a few things there once in a while. What amazed me is just how MANY organic foods the story carried. Entire aisles full. It was a completely different experience than a mere few years ago. (Granted I cannot accurately guarantee when the last time I was actually in a grocery store, but still…)

At the check out counter there was a ragtag little flyer hanging up on the register that announced a lecture they were having this weekend to help explain “Organics”. I was amazed. SO much so that I snapped a picture of it. Frankly it gave me hope. Things do seem at times totally screwed and insane here now, it’s true. This isn’t the world of even ten years ago. The world has lost its mind. But for every crazy moment in our linear lives, for every mad shooter and bomber, for every lying politician full of greed and deceit, there seems to be some other remarkable moment of evolution that can give us hope that things just may be improving along the way as well. That’s how I took this little sign about the over 300 different organic foods that this regular big-box mom and pop grocery store now carries. A sort of sign of evolution.

On another note, related, the entire time we shopped, we used this app we’ve downloaded on our iPhones called Buycott. You simply hold your phone over the barcode of anything you want to purchase and in a second or two it tells you whether it has any GMO products in it or if it is owned by a company who makes GMO foods or has ever supported the “non labeling of GMO foods” bill. It was amazing. Even more impactful in the long run probably is the fact that with the touch of a button you can then SHARE what you discover with all your friends on the social network of your choice. I have a feeling this will compel a lot of these big food manufacturers to stop the GMO bullshit faster than any protests on the steps of the Capital Building will at this point. It’s a brilliant app. Download it on the iTunes app store when you can.

Regarding Truth There Is No Absolute

I don’t know how it is possible. I just have a feeling that it is. It is the question I get asked the most regarding my theory that there are very few singular absolutes in the universe, regarding our after-death cosmological beliefs. People have a tough time swallowing the idea that there may be multiple realities co-existing simultaneously in the world now and after the death of the body. They want to believe that what “they” believe is the truth. It is the nature of common-era humankind. And from what we can tell from history this has been trending for thousands of years. Not forever, for we all know from our study of anthropology that there was a time when human beings weren’t smart enough to have developed solid belief systems about the after life. In fact, it is known that tens of thousands of years ago, when one member of a tribe would die, the other tribe members would simply leave that person’s body there to rot and they’d keep moving, no thought at all about a soul or an after life.
It seems that a belief in the afterlife and all it’s inherent subsequent co-beliefs was a more recent development in our evolution. Along with beliefs in an afterlife came beliefs about what that afterlife looked like, how many different places there were there, the prerequisites for attaining the status necessary to get to these different areas of the afterlife, and last but not least the creation of a God that would be the sole judge of who goes where and why. Eventually elaborate rituals were created surrounding the death of our physical body, a variety of them, each different depending upon the geographic location of the people who held the beliefs that created the need for the rituals. All of them based primarily on that people’s beliefs in the God they had created and their ideas of the afterlife.
Which leads us to where we are today. Put simply, humankind is at odds with itself in regards to which tribe’s view of the afterlife is the “right one”, and who’s version of God is the “correct one”. Wars are fought over these beliefs. Territories are fought over these beliefs — based on the conviction of how sacred and important these territories are to each tribe’s religious belief system. Think Israel/Palestine. Still to this day, as a collective species, we don’t know any more about God or the afterlife than we did back in our caveman days when we first started to develop these beliefs. But that does not stop people from doing the damnedest things to defend them.
After more than twenty-five years studying every known idea that has been proffered by humankind about God and Goddess, afterlife or no afterlife, I have come to understand that each has their merit. Each also has their fair share of ridiculousness. It is the nature of creating belief systems about things that we know nothing about. Christians for instance have a good idea historically that the man that is called Jesus of Nazareth existed. But of his life and the God and afterlife he allegedly spoke of, we know very little. In fact there really isn’t anything about it that can be historically or scientifically proved. The foundation of the entire belief system, other than the fact that the man Jesus existed, rests solely on another belief system humankind invented, something that is called “faith”.
Put simply, the idea that we do not need historical or scientific explanation or proof for something in order to believe it. This is a very useful invention, perhaps one of humankind’s most useful. It is convenient. Especially when attempting to get large numbers of people to believe in something that there is no proof for. Whoever came up with the idea was a genius.
The other day a fan wrote in to tell me that she did not agree with my religious beliefs because she worships the “Divine Creatress”, the Goddess, that in fact she is the reincarnation of Mary Magdelene. She went on to say that Jesus appeared to her in several visions as “the evil one”, Lucifer’s brother. This was a new one. I had heard that the Mormon’s believe that Jesus and Lucifer were brothers. But I had never heard that Jesus was evil. Good enough I told her. I don’t judge. Who’s to tell anyway? When all of it is founded upon nothing in reality. Except faith. And belief. So the Mormons believe that there are three heavens, that there is no hell, that if you get to the biggest best heaven that it is paved in gold and that you even get your own private planet all to yourself; that God and Jesus walked the earth together as men once. Where you might ask? In America. But of course. And where might the new Jerusalem be when Jesus returns in all of his glory? In America. But of course. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Muslims believe that Abraham did indeed receive instructions from God to take his son to the desert to sacrifice him only to be relieved of the duty only seconds before he was about to do the evil deed. But they believe that the son in question was Ishmael, not Issac. Who’s right? Who knows? That’s the real answer. Truth is, we have no proof of any of it. Scholars, if you can call them that, are torn right down the middle. Perhaps Abraham attempted to sacrifice both his sons at one time or another and thus both parties are right.
Regardless, my view is that rather than worry about who’s right and who’s wrong, why not allow that each individual might be creating their own little world and all of it’s experiences all on their own, perhaps with a God or without, depending on what they believe, and that each of these realities that they envision could be true. Multiple dimensions of reality for a multitude of people. Multiple universes even. Again, who knows? If someone believes in reincarnation, as Buddhists and Hindus do, then they in turn will experience being reincarnated at the time of their death, time and time again until they finally decide to change their mind about that belief. That doesn’t necessitate that ALL of us will be reincarnated. Not if we don’t believe in it we won’t.
Same with heaven and hell. I know plenty of people who don’t even believe in heaven. At least they claim not to. Well what if for them there is no heaven waiting for them. Depending on what they “really” believe at the time of their passing from this world, that will be what they create experiencing. For them, those that don’t believe in a heaven or an afterlife of any kind, perhaps their brain will just turn off and they will go to sleep forever. What of their soul you ask? What if the system we have created is so vastly superior to anything that we can imagine that it is even possible to NOT create having a soul if one so chooses. Then again, let’s be real here. There is much more likely a chance that there is no soul than that there is. Human beings, living things, possessing that which we call “a soul” is a human invention. Brought about by the terrifying fear of our own mortality. So logic and reason is on the side of us not really possessing anything other than very creative imaginations housed in brains that when finally turned off, turn off forever. No soul. No heaven. No afterlife.
But then again, perhaps it’s deeper than that. More advanced by this point. Perhaps as we imagine these things, we bring them into being through the conscious creation of them. I don’t personally believe in hell. It doesn’t fit my own personal cosmological constructs. Doesn’t fit my idea of a loving God, the idea I have of God creating such a thing is oxymoronic. It doesn’t line up. So for me, no worries. No hell. But I do believe in a sort of heaven. Like most people, I have an idea of it. They say that nearly 80% of modern day humans do. That’s actually a small number when you think about it. It leaves almost two billion people out there not believing they will go to heaven when they die. But perhaps for them they believe they will be reincarnated instead. And so they will.
The point is that in a multi-dimensional universe, in a universe with an infinite number of dimensional possibilities, there is plenty of room for people to experience anything they want to after the death of their body. For all we know, the heaven dimension could be just above or below the hell dimension, with the Purgatory dimension, for those that feel a need to believe in such a place, sitting right next to it, or in between it, and the reincarnation lobby could be right next to that. Think of giant spheres, intertwined together…. touching but not interfering with one another. One of those reality spheres would obviously have to be the physical world, the world that we are in right this very minute. Another one could be the world of spirits and angels, another dimension entirely.
If one is looking for a way to view the world that is as inclusive and tolerant as possible of all our fellow inhabitants and their various philosophical and religious viewpoints, this is the most intelligent and logical explanation there can be to help explain how we’ve managed to create so many contradicting beliefs about what lay on the other side of the physical world. Of course there is a damn good chance that we are just inventing and imagining all of it. But why go there? Unless you want to. But just in case you don’t want to, and you long to believe that there is a loving God somewhere in the universe that is waiting to embrace you after the death of your physical body, modern day physics — especially Super String Theory — allows for you to believe in such things, for in order for the theory to even function properly it needs there to be at least ten, eleven or twelve dimensions in the known universe.
We know of at least three of them: up and down, side to side, forward and backward; and some posit that time is the fourth dimension, though I personally do not subscribe to this idea. Point being that there are plenty of other dimensions in the universe that we still know nothing about. One of them could easily be heaven. One of them could be that waiting station where people go before they reincarnate. One of them could be the realm of angels and the undead, so called spirits who haven’t quite integrated into their new form yet. One of them could be that hell that some people speak of. Remember, WE might not believe in hell, but if enough people do, even if it’s a small number of people (and as frightening as it is, that number is not actually that small), then there is reason to believe that through conscious creation they have found a way to create this hell dimension for themselves.
Some people believe that spirit guides watch over them. Others believe that the spirits of their dead relatives watch over them. Because we have no proof of this, because we’ve never seen these spirits, this would require that they have their own dimension that they exist in, much like our 3D world that we call “physical reality” is its own dimension. This theory allows that those who believe in this spiritual realm are right, that they’re correct, at least for them they are. If they walk around in this life believing that grandma is looking out for them from the spirit world, so it is. And scientifically it is absolutely plausible now.
What I do not and cannot believe is that there is any one place where everyone on planet earth (and other planets with life on them) goes to — just because one small group of people say so. It just doesn’t pass the litmus test for reality creation. Consciousness is bigger than that. If any of us are right, then all of us are right. If one of us is wrong, then we’re all wrong. I tend to favor the side that says that somehow we are all right in our own way, that through our very desire for and creation of the idea of what an afterlife might look and be like, that we have created such an afterlife. In consciousness at the very least. Which trust me, I know is a slippery slope. Because one could then easily ask “what is consciousness if not just electrical signals in and emanating from the brain of organic life forms?”
But let us imagine for a moment that through the power of consciousness we have created not just ourselves, but the entire universe that we exist in…. That consciousness is not in the universe, nor of the universe, but rather that the universe is a construct of consciousness. A living breathing cosmological manifestation of consciousness. Cosmic consciousness being the grandaddy of them all, the collective of all consciousness that has ever been, come together to create that which we might label “God” or “Source” or “The Force” or even the more modern “collective consciousness”. Each of us a piece of this collective, at once separate from it and still a part of it. And that through our collective creative powers as one giant heaving mass of consciousness that we have discovered reality creation. This would explain a lot. At the very least it helps us understand the prevalence of the idea of God, and the very creation of the universe itself.
More later. Always more.

The Future

The thought occurred to me last night as i typed yet another communication to yet another associate how ridiculous it is that i was TYPING WORD BY WORD to get my simple message across. one or two ideas… simple enough. and here i was having to actually sit there and TYPE. letter by letter. word by word. absolutely insane when you think about it. why are we so far back still in our evolution that we are still forced to type our communications? or voice them over the phone?

the future? aw man, that’s an easy one. you think it and it is.

later that night i am watching the movie FAST FOOD NATION as i lie half asleep i notice a few people in a van crossing the border from Mexico to the US. on their way to Colorado. the American dream and all that. and I’m watching them drive. and this thought occurs to me. again. coincidence? nah. i just think it’s where I’m at now. I’m thinking, people have to fucking drive to get from one place to another. look at those poor old-timers sitting in that automobile for hours to get from one place to another. how old school is that? i was just in shock.

not that i have been to the other side yet. not that i have been there. seen it. not in real life anyway. but i can tell you this much. we aren’t going to be driving in cars to get from a to z forever. and we aren’t going to be sitting here typing our ideas into little boxes with our fingers. if you ask me this is all quite ridiculous. i can see the future and it doesn’t look like this.

you know, it is no wonder that more advanced civilizations in the universe find their physical bodies less and less important. as we progress mentally emotionally and spiritually we will be able to accomplish that much more without much need for these physical tasks and there will be less and less of a need for them. the bodies served their purpose fine for the last million years or so but alot of these mundane-linear-time-tasks are tired to me. so old school that they make me yawn.

its time we get on with the next phase of our evolution. obviously in place of typing or speaking via phone we will be able to communicate through space-time with our minds. and again just as obvious instead of sitting in a metal box for hours either driving or flying to get from a to z we will be teleporting ourselves somehow in an instant. now I’m no inventor. so i cant muster up the technology. but i can see it as clear as day. and if it aint going to happen tomorrow i can guarantee it’s on the horizon. just as surely as we saw electricity or flying or faxing or the internet as big-time revolutionary inventions we will see these other ideas come to pass soon enough.

on with the show people. inventors start your engines and let’s get on with it. the ambassador is bored with the old. bring on the new.

Some recent pictures of Tehran, in Iran.

Some recent pictures of Tehran, in Iran. When one sees these pictures, one does not immediately think of the Iran that we see on the news in America. An entirely different scenario comes into view really than the paranoid delusions the American government tends to try to pass on to the unsuspecting public. In America when we think of Iran we think of the third world, a manic people obsessed with bombs and religious and military fanaticism. And yet the more you get to know the city and its people, a very open minded and artistic nature begins to appear, very much still like the grand Persian empire we study in our youth. Such a sense of style they seem to posses. my prediction is that Iran is now opening up culturally, their soul is opening and is about to flourish. Not because of the revolution that created the current conservative Muslim government that controls them but in spite of it. they are ready for another cultural revolution, but it will come slowly and subtly and methodically this time. through their people’s understanding that making money is what changes societies, not overthrowing your government. (of course if this were true, America wouldn’t be the prisoners we currently are under this evil regime). In any case Iran is the youngest country in the world today. over fifty percent of their population is under the age of thirty. Their favorite country in the world is America. This is true. they love everything American. They are not against us or about to attack us. they feel threatened by us of course, because of what we are doing to Palestine and Iraq, but they love our culture. I’ll tell you, the best thing we could do is overthrow both the American and the current Iranian governments and put in our own people controlled governments instead of these current corporate run ones. Take the current ones and put all these old guys in their boring old suits on an island somewhere in the pacific, give them a bunch of guns and bombs and let them fight it out as long as they want to or until they’re all dead. Then we use the island as giant garbage dump for the whole world. that my friends is what we should really do.

So the Iranian people if you are lucky enough to know them, their hearts are open now and they are ready to join the western world and even more importantly carve out a special place of their own. let us hope they will still be able to maintain their own cultural identity and that America won’t attack or attempt to control as it always seems to want to. I have a great feeling about the country and people Iran. There is something in the air about it, something I feel intuitively. Pictures below tell more than I can possibly muster up with words. something about Iran that is going to be spectacular once they fully release themselves.

[evolution: it is happening all over the earth now. a real cultural revolution in the soul of humankind. Again, in my opinion, in spite of radically conservative militant and intolerant governments like the current American, Chinese, Cuban, or north Korean or so many other governments and their grand schemes of deception and imperialism. The people are still forging onward and breaking new ground.

We see this evolution everywhere. we are constantly evolving now. at a very rapid pace. If you are an early adopter, someone who is always on the cutting edge of thought and use, you notice it daily. You notice it on the Internet especially, how the interface and usability is constantly changing. Systems like eBay or Amazon or myspace or p2p sharing platforms are always improving and shifting gears. Its exciting. Pop-culturists do not notice it as much because for the most part they stay in the center of the mainstream and never venture out too much; the business of pop culture is to keep the majority of the people in the same mind frame year after tired year so they keep buying whatever the suits are selling and don’t migrate to any new anythings. “Here’s a pretty face. She wants to have sex with you. really she does. Here’s a hot guy. you can be just like him. really you can. here’s a funny guy. his show is on at 8pm prime time. watch him. everyone does. Really they do. here’s some fresh new music for you. it was created especially for you by ten writers, fifteen producers, twelve remixers, and thirty thousand backing vocal tracks to sound just like everything else being made today. you’ll like it. really you will. everyone does. Here’s four hot chicks. They’re show is on at ten because its hot and racy. If you watch it, you’ll be cool. really you will. Its just like last years show with four hot girls that was hot and racy and everyone that watched it was cool. Don’t touch that dial. (big smile here) Use your credit card and buy today.” [insert big-teeth-smiling-face here, and perhaps another hot guy or two laughing while he swings his hot girl around the room a few times.] Flip on network TV or even cable, not that I’m recommending that, but go ahead, do it for even a few seconds just for fun or if you need to induce vomiting, you’ll see what I mean. it is de-evolution at its finest.

But yes, as we open up we see the evolution taking place all around us in spite of the mainstream. And yes it’s exciting. humankind is slowly evolving right before our eyes.

During the presidential debates we saw firsthand what it is like to live amongst a human society that is in between an evolutionary cycle revolving around one particular subject. Evolution is a very slow process, so we didn’t necessarily notice it. we never do. we only read about evolution in history books after we are all dead and we have had time to view it from afar. But after reflection one can remember the debate on same sex marriage as being a good example of this in-between stage in our evolution regarding this particular subject. If one can propel oneself into the future, even if only a few years from now, one can easily see that same sex marriage is a non-issue. Its happening. it will happen. there is work to be done of course, but this is not something we have to worry about. just as with women’s rights. It was only a matter of time before the human brain evolved enough to allow it to happen. most of this stuff is fear-based. Small brain stuff. the men were afraid to let women vote and have equal rights. The women were afraid to stand up to the men. So nothing happened for two thousand years. but eventually it happened. And eventually same sex marriage will seem as common place as women going to the polls to vote.

reflecting on the debates last night I was remembering how both men were very afraid to say anything about it. both very cautious, afraid because of this imaginary middle America that is evidently so threatened by tom and tom getting hitched that they’re going to base their election of a United States president on the matter. Forget that they’re all losing their jobs overseas and that our environment is being speedily sold off to the highest corporate bidders, that none of us have health insurance that’s worth a damn, or that our government is selling our country out from under us to china in the form of T-bills. Forget all that. don’t let fucking tom and tom get married or these middle Americans are really going to be pissed.

So anyway if you saw the debates you got to see what evolution looks like before it actually fast-forwards. Same sex marriage is an issue that is about to fast-forward in American society and on a larger scale in the entire human population. [the term fast-forward meaning that just before a subject or an issue evolves in human society, there is a slowdown, a pause, a hold back by the slower thinking, slower evolving moral majority among us, and then bam! It fast forwards to its rightful conclusion. I’m not sure if anyone else has already noticed this phenom but its obvious.] What we saw when we listened to those two men state their humble opinions that they are against same sex marriage because it is against their religions is the last howl by a bunch of old timer, slower-evolving, dying old cows before they are led to the slaughter. Not bad animals at all. served their purpose. And so we honor them. but unfortunately they are not serving humankind anymore because they are being held back by old world non-evolving states of mind. In ten years we are going to study these debates in our public schools in college when we are studying the cultural evolution of human rights. Read me now, believe me later.]

Anyway enough of my babbling. Here are those pictures of Iran I promised you: I think they will surprise a lot of us.

Subject: Recent Pictures of Tehran
For those of you who haven’t been in Tehran in a while, here’s how the city and the people have changed.

Saman Complex – Tehran
Tehran Philharmonic Orchestra
Apartment interior – Tehran
Interior of a Tehran residence
Under-the-Caspian restaurant
Outdoor Cafe – Tehran, Iran
Mall
Office Building – Tehran, Iran
 Art in the Tehran Metro
Residential Buildings – Tehran, Iran
 Entrance of luxury condo in Tehran
Lobby of luxury condo in Tehran
 
 Living room of luxury condo apartment
Niyavaran
Luxury condo apartment in Tehran
View over Tehran, Iran
New Project – Luxury condos in Tehran
Commercial building – Tehran, Iran
New Project / Iran-Tehran
Tehran residential buildings
People – Tehran
Racer Laleh Seddigh
Shemshak ski resort

We can see the slow but constant evolution all around us all the time

We can see the slow but constant cultural evolution all around us all the time. thought about candy the other night. yes candy. As always mom sends a ten pound box of it every year for Easter no matter where I am in the world. [this is just one of those awesome things about having a mom that you hope one day you can reciprocate. I return to my humble abode from being home for the holidays with a five pound Christmas stocking filled with gifts and candy and homemade cookies etc. then Easter comes around and I get these huge boxes of Easter candy, and then of course for Halloween the same thing… maybe she’s secretly trying to kill me and Beav so she can take our money… LOL. but prob not. prob just trying to be sweet, forgive the pun, like moms do.] so I’m noticing that some Christmas candy had snuck into the Easter basket. How did I know this? because I was eating from a big handful of jellybeans and bunny and egg shaped chocolates when all of a sudden I realized that I was eating a bell shaped chocolate instead. of course one often doesn’t notice things like this. and just eats away, but with my limited lack of a life I was more than prepared to meet this challenge head-on and stop the whole damn event right there in its tracks. the problem was that these chocolate and peanut butter bells were my favorite treat in the whole damn fifteen pound box of sweets. And here they were bells left over from Christmas, somehow managed to surreptitiously jump out of my Christmas stocking obviously, and not having anything whatsoever to do with Easter. So what right had I to sit there eating from a box that was at best only pretending to be an Easter basket in the first place and then not even to be eating Easter shaped chocolates? Perplexed I was to say the least.

Anyway eventually I noticed that the bell shaped candies were actually made by the ever lovable Mr. Butterfinger. And that’s my point. The major candy companies finally figured out after decades that they could take over the holiday candy market. And that in its own little way is evolution.

And let us not forget Monsieur Goozalu (the Persian word for “making wind” or passing gas) a very famous fartist from abroad. At first coming from the visual farts, he soon realized that if he added sound to his works of fart that he would win even more fame and prestige and literally could floor his audiences. His famous fart exhibits include the very popular annual ‘fart in the park’ among many others.

Last screening: star wars revenge of the sith. Yes I must admit that I was the one in case I disturbed you that yelled “Yew!” at the very beginning of the film when the intro appeared on screen. Just couldn’t help it. it has been a while hasn’t it and I was certainly as excited as anyone else there. But alas like the other two before it, just didn’t quite cut it did it. by far the best one of the lot, but still left a lot to be desired. And one would mean that literally in this case rather than just cleverly copping a phrase to impress the next door neighbor in the knee high black leather boots. You do indeed walk away desiring a lot after sitting to watch these films. One wonders where is star wars? Where is that magic fairy dust that seemed to cover the first three when we were tiny tots. This one, wow, talk about bad dialogue versus no dialogue. Which was worse? The complete lack of story, sub-plot, or depth or the brief moments when we were forced to suffer through Samuel l Jackson pretend to be a Jedi master. Natalie Portman from what I can gather played a mannequin in a runway fashion show  many costume changes to mark her different appearances where she just stood with her mouth dangling open staring out large windows thinking one assumes ‘just which of those damned designers put this old football helmet on my head and how long do I have to wear it?’ haydon God bless him delivered probably his best performance yet which doesn’t say much because his performances in these lucas disasters to date have been any word you can think of which has a wose connotation than dreadful. But still, he did his best job in this one. about as believable being evil as mickey mouse would be or Kermit the frog. Speaking of Kermit, yoda was as always hilarious without intentionally trying to be the poor bastard, doing all these flips and still not getting after all these years that the verbs follow the subjects when you’re speaking English. The first hour or two was just a lot of video game fighting between God knows who for only God knows what in very fake plastic computerized looking worlds… But to be fair as always the scenery was quite fascinating and at times exhilarating to view on the big screen and one was in awe of the special effects and detail involved in putting it all together. but beware now I warn you of the scene where Ewan McGregor is riding on the back of a rubber dinosaur chasing a robot riding in a metal donut. So yes this too like the other two leave you longing for the first ones. oh well. we still have those very first two at least. I have some friends who worked on this film and they say the problem is that because George is George and everyone is so damned impressed to be working with him that no one says anything, no suggestions or critiquing. So its George doing his thing with no input whatsoever. I believe in input as an artist. The more the better. I have another friend who is an assistant to Ron Howard and he says that working with Ron is the exact opposite. He is always asking for people’s opinions so his movies tend to be better, more collaborative efforts and I think that comes through on the big screen.

Date?
In the movie theatre right now waiting for the new star wars movie to start. I have this cool fucking leather bag in San fran that hangs just right and is small enough to carry my laptop over my shoulder with minimal discomfort and so now I carry it everywhere with me because its easy. and so right there in the theatre before the movie started I was able to whip out the old laptop and start writing. right there in the theatre? weird? maybe. But in New York no matter what you do it seems as normal and acceptable as crossing the street. God bless our beloved New York. may I never live anywhere else.

If I could plug my brain into a machine

In the subway. Ipod blaring in my ears. I can’t hear a thing around me. just this pounding music. so I’m watching everyone…. I see a strange response around me from many people. I take off an earbud and hear that we are now stuck in the middle of a fucking tunnel two full stories underneath the ground and we will be here for at least fifteen minutes because the train in front of us is broken… talk about a freak out. everyone is freaking out. standing up and trying to calm down… eventually people calm down. There is no way out…

I watch as everyone is reading their various things. a girl next to me is studying some textbook. And a girl across the way is reading some magazine article and a guy is reading some science fiction book and someone else is reading some technical manual for his job. And I’m thinking… I’m so sick of the way humanity still is… with this way we have to read everything…we’re so primitive. Still having to read and type. We’re just not getting it at all. we’re so not there. so totally unconvinced that this is the ultimate method for obtaining data, of downloading data into our internal hard drives of our brain. Its like we’re a bunch of cavemen still. each of us supposed to major in something so we can do that as our job and we have to sit here and read all this shit and learn it so we can do that as our job…. the matrix movie really had it with the whole concept of plugging in or jacking in and downloading whole knowledge banks into our brains. When will this happen? and why the fuck do I have to sit here and type? Its so fucking frustrating. So old school. So last century. There has to be a better way.

Just as mark twain used to have to sit and hand write and then later say tom Robbins had to sit and type on a typewriter we too are still totally trapped by our having to sit and type into a computer. If only I could plug my brain into a machine that would allow my thoughts to instantly transfer to the page…

Current spin: The streets new one. very cool.

What the bleep

The Poet calls me. About that movie what the bleep do we know.
“Dog. did you see it?”
“yeah. Heard it all before. but cool that its hitting the masses now…”
“well some cat, who’s gay by the way, not that that means anything, here totally destroys it in a recent review in the paper. says its garbage and not scientific… I wondered what you thought about it…”
“Look man I didn’t even like the movie. You know. I fell asleep. But to try to discount the scientific theories that that movie is talking about is ridiculous. These aren’t even new theories. Scientists have been talking about them for years. since the late eighties when that whole “science meets metaphysics” concept first started. Books like the Tao of physics and dancing with the wu li masters… so this guy you’re talking about is an idiot to try to even discount it… sure it was a boring movie… ameturish. I’ll give you that. but c’mon. At this point its obvious we’re controlling a lot of what were experiencing through some sort of unconscious or semi-conscious manipulation of molecules with our mind energy…. it’s a given… I don’t have the time to argue with these idiots anymore if they don’t get it…”
“I thought you’d say that. you would think so.”
“maybe the guy is just pissed that he was born gay and feels trapped by it, you know, genetically… so he refuses to accept that we have any control of our own destinies and would rather have a fatalist attitude about life….”
“I don’t know. but he just says that there is no scientific proof that we can have any control at all of the molecular nature of the world…”
“yeah, well then he’s been living in a fucking cave for the last twenty years. cause everyone’s talking about it now. I’m not saying that were doing it all a hundred percent. You know. I mean lets be real. If we were controlling our own destinies I wouldn’t be talking to you from an office… I’d be in the back of a limo with a glass of Cristal in my left hand and there’d be three Swedish sixteen year olds going down on me…”
sixteen year olds? Wow. I like that man. Tell it like it is.
hey why hold back man. You know what I mean. but I’m not in the back of a limo..
with three Swedish sixteen year olds going down on you?
exactly. so obviously we aren’t controlling our destinies a hundred percent… but c’mon man… I’ve learned enough. I’ve seen enough… obviously we’re controlling a good portion of it… at this point a lot of people can see that… can feel it. there’s no question about it. regardless of what certain scientists are going to say. Some of them will be the last to let on that they get it. because it defies the laws of current scientific thought. And that’s their job. God bless them because that’s what they’re there for.
“It just goes to show how far off our scientific knowledge of the day can be…”
Exactly.
Right now, here in Atlanta Georgia there are schools that because of supposed scientific knowledge certain schools are not allowed to teach evolution…
Exactly. unbelievable. And according to current scientific knowledge of the sixteen hundreds Galileo was thrown into jail in Florence because he said the earth revolved around the sun. so go figure. So that’s current scientific knowledge for you. Right now we assume the earth revolves around the sun. But for all we know, there’s another body that the sun is revolving around but we just can’t see it because its too big or too small or it exists in some other dimension… who the fuck knows? Current scientific knowledge is only as good as people are willing to extend their imagination beyond it…
Well said Mr. Ambassador. Dude. The universe is fucking expanding. Have you ever thought about that?
Yeah, I know. fucked up. makes me anxious. I have to take a valium when I think about it. how can you feel grounded when you think about that? I just wish everything would stop moving for a while.

My dreamy lover… how I miss you… lets go out tonight. lets eat Indian food and fall asleep on each others laps listening to music in a public place…